The Story Only I Know
by Kaoru Hideki
Summary: Series: Durarara! Pairing: Shizaya Summary: Do you still remember that night? The night in which we were stargazing together? I was about to tell you something, something that I've meant to tell you the first time we met. Yet, my chance was ruined. So…I've been wondering, can we go stargazing again? And replay everything what happened? Disclaimer: I own none of these charact


Love, such a fragile and bothersome emotion, yet, it can make the most depressed person feel like they live in Heaven, no?

Pathetic, the feeling is pathetic. I almost gag when I see couples walking hand-in-hand down the pavement, all lovey-dovey with one another. It sickens me. Why would one depend on another human when they have themselves? Truly disgusting. There's no such thing as 'the one', we're all the same, every human is the same, we're all equal to God.

If there is a God, that is. Because, you see, the 'God' most humans believe in, has failed one of his duties. The duty to make interesting creatures, to be exact. He has made humans, yet, every human is equally before him, that makes it all less fun.

I love humanity, I love the humans, their expressions, their reactions, the way they act, live, speak, I love it. I observe humans, I am their shadow, lurking in the darkness behind them, watching their every move, and registering everything they do. Due to this all, I know everything about every human—there's nothing I don't know about the humans I observe, I know their deepest and darkest secrets, things they've been hiding from the world all along, yet, I know it. I know it all—and there's nothing you can do about it. Humans always live up to my expectations. Due to the amount of observing and knowledge I have about these creatures, I can easily predict what one would do in a certain situation. For example, if you would be in a life threatening fight, you would fight back, no? That's because humans have a special thing inside them; something which won't let them die. Once exposed to a near death experience, it kicks in and the mind goes blank, trying its hardest just to stay alive.

Now, now, don't say you don't have this, just because you're in a depression, and you'd want to commit suicide. Because, in the end, my dear human, the feeling will kick in and you'd regret your actions, but sometimes, _it's a little too late to turn back, ne?_

Yet, there's one human—no, _monster _who won't live up to my expectations. Every prediction I make about him, ends up being dismissed and he does completely the opposite of what I'd expect him to do. I hate it. I love humanity, but I don't love him. He's not allowed to be human—because I love humans, therefore he's a monster. A monster with monstrous strength. Even when he gets hit by a damned bus he would manage to get up and continue living like nothing happened. How, you ask? It's a mystery for me. I can't seem to decipher why he has such monstrous strength and amazing healing abilities.

_Heiwajima Shizuo._

That's the man's name. Rather tall male with dyed blond hair wearing a bartender outfit. You've probably seen him around Ikebukuro, chasing me.

He hates me, he hates me so much. I can't blame him, though. Due to the things I've caused—_we've _caused, he hates me. But that's alright. I hate him back. The damn blond with his damned monstrous strength and damned short temper. _Damn. _If anyone would deserve his strength, it would most certainly not be Shizu-chan. I only need to show my face to make him explode into anger! Isn't that amusing? The expressions he makes, so amusing, ha ha! He needs a thropy: '_The World's Most Angry Monster'. _

It all happened so fast, the way we met.

Shinra introduced us to one another, and at the moment our eyes met, a strange burning feeling went through my heart. The blond hair, the masculine build, the amber eyes, the facial structure. _Enchanting._

I was startled by his appearance—surely had Shinra told me about Shizu-chan before, but never did I expect him to be like this; everything I'd ever dreamt about.

What even surprised me more, was that the blond managed to fight off a lot of, what seemed like, students. With a lot, I don't mine three or two, but _a lot, _like, about, fifty, perhaps? _Inhuman._ I felt my heartbeat increase erratically and my hands started to tremble slightly—never, in my whole life, had I expected to meet someone like this. It made my heart flutter and my mind go nuts. Though, I could never show the emotions that were flowing through my mind and heart to Shinra and Shizu-chan, so I smiled not-so-kindly, using the façade I build up throughout the years of experience, the kind face I showed to everyone: eyes sparkling with kindness, yet if one would look closer they'd noticed the hidden message in them and the sweet smile, also filled with a hidden message.

I decided to provoke him a little, trying to get any informant out of this certain monster—because he looked so _tempting_ to provoke. Like he was thrown on Earth just for me! Well, that was, until he decided to punch me without a reason. I only made a joke, geez. How could he have become so angry? He stormed towards me, the anger flashing dangerously in his eyes as he aimed the punch my head. Shizu-chan might've been stronger—and hell of a lot stronger now—but his aim was bad, _very bad. _I dodged the fist with mere ease, and immediately I reached in my pocket to slash Shizu-chan's chest, leaving a big scar.

I guess one could say that this is how our hate relationship started.

Tch, relationship. Why do I even call it a relationship? It's more likely a rivalry. The damn brute hates me with all his heart—if he even has one, that is, which I hardly doubt. Still, after what happened that other day, my heart broke. My heart, which I built a large wall around—not letting anyone close to me, _it broke, _due to the damn brute and his actions. And don't forget my façade, it dropped within seconds after the event, all the colors in my face disappeared, and I felt like someone stabbed me with thousands of needles. _Ouch._

He didn't give me any attention—therefore I had to keep provoking him, _anything, just anything for his attention to me. _I literally tried everything, using other people to communicate for me, communicating him directly, and doing it throughout text messages. How I got his number? I'll tell you that some other time.

It hurt. So much. I didn't see anything else but anger in those eyes, never anything else but anger, anger, _damned anger! _The way he acted to his friends, kind, smiling, his eyes full of joy and laughter—what I'd do to see Shizu-chan make such expressions towards me. He's never done anything kind towards me, despicable.

My name is Orihara Izaya, informant broker from Shinjuku. Pleasure to meet'cha. You know, until know, I haven't realized there still are things even _I _don't know about. Things about myself. I always thought myself as a-sexual, since every human was the same, none seemed to pick my interest. I was loved by many people, especially the girls, but they were never my type, always too damned noisy, cheerful , just not my style.

That damned brute through my whole sexuality about. _Faith, destiny, _I didn't believe in that shit until I met him—damn, how I'd wish to never meet him. Everytime I see him, he makes my heart flutter with both sadness and enjoyment, and all I can do is make him chase me around Ikebukuro.

I'd never expect,

I'd honestly never expect,

That the great Orihara Izaya,

Would fall in love.


End file.
